Mang Juggling Advice from a Mang (told through a babe)

On Saturday night, while walking through the baberhood, dangerously close to our old friend Higgins, Birdie turned to me and asked, "have you always been a mang juggler?"

Important side note: different from a mang jangler, a mang juggler is one who casually dates multiple mangs . . . now, to jangle or not to jangle while juggling is a dangerous and personal question that will not be answered in this posting, or ever.

To the point of this posting though . . . I am not a mang juggler. At least not at heart. But, pursuing the advice of my co-worker Loafers (see earlier post), I have thrown myself into the dating world and inadvertently ended up juggling (sort of). So, in doubt, I turned back to Loafers for some advice . . . how does one mang juggle? Here's what I got:

(disclaimer: I do not embrace all of Loafers' advice - in fact, I don't embrace most of it. But who am I to deprive all of the TFB readers of the sage advice of a man who wears tailored shorts with a blazer and loafers?)

1 - Approach everything as a negotiation. Wait until the other person broaches the topic of exclusivity and don't give in too easily. You can easily drag it out 8-10 dates before having to be exclusive. (please note that this directly contradicts Loafers' earlier advice that I should just settle for whatever I can get before my babehood slips away.)

2 - Don't make any decisions after the first jangle - always jangle twice before you decide if you want to be exclusive. (I almost spit coffee at him on this one, then I thought about handing him an at home J(angling) TD testing kit. In the end, I just listened politely. Like I said, to jangle or not to jangle is a personal question.)

3 - What really matters most is scheduling. Mangs are interchangeable - if a mang doesn't fit with your schedule, find a mang who does. (ah, true romance . . .)

4 - Look for a mang who wears something memorable on a first date, like a blazer or a recreational tie. You don't want to date the mang who just shows up in jeans and a shirt. (I didn't know how to tell him that's exactly the mang I want to date . . .)

5 - "If it doesn't feel a little bit dirty, you're doing something wrong." (This was where I left. I didn't ask for clarification. I just walked away.)

So there you have it. Mang juggling advice from a mang himself. I don't know if it's good advice considering I haven't implemented any of it, but I wanted to share it so that others, who may wish to juggle, may try it. Take all of it, take none of it, or maybe just take as a sign that hanging with the babes is a better use of your time than mang juggling . . . although, as we say in the Clifton family, sometimes its worth it for the story value . . .

TFB

-NC